Learning Disabilities and Sensitivities - Protection or something we should fix?
It is common to talk about supporting people to work with or to overcome their blocks to learning and sensitivities, but what if these are protection?
Introductory photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash
Mainstream society seems to think that:
- what we learn in school is the ultimate truth,
- all kids need the same building blocks, at the same age, in order to be able to learn and function, and
- if a child fails to learn in the expected manner (timeline or environment) we assume something might be wrong with the child, and remediation is needed, in order to get the child back on track and capable of functioning in the "normal" school environment.
In fact, sadly, many parents are encouraged to pressure their children to stay on track (in their learning and participation) so that this does not happen, and teasing among peers is not really discouraged, as the goal is to put whatever pressure is needed on all children, so that, in the end, they all conform.
Trying to fit SQUARE information into a ROUND mind/brain
But, what if this is wrong?
- What if what school teaches is what mainstream believes to be the truth?
- What if there are multiple versions of the truth?
- What if a child is trying to hold onto what they believe, and it is in such contrast with what they are being taught in school, that this is the reason that they can not integrate the information school is trying to ingrain in them?
- What if they are temporarily: overwhelmed, full, processing, detoxifying (aka. dropping baggage), and this is why they can not take in any more information at this time?
There are actually markers for this in someone's Soul Contract.
Specifically, someone who carries an 11-2 (or multiple 11-2s) is here to build their own version of the truth. Often this takes time. So, the person has to make a choice - adopt someone else's beliefs OR wait to form their own beliefs.
As you can imagine, adopting someone else's beliefs is the less healthy option, and often results in later emotional instability, and the need to drop the baggage others have put on them, to eventually, and finally, do what they were supposed to do in the first place - Build their own belief system.
Secondly, someone who carries a 10-1 in the physical part of their Soul Contract is likely to have trouble finding their place in mainstream society, because they are not here to play the mainstream (money making, survival) game. Instead, they are here to find their niche and be of service. This probably doesn't look so much like a learning disability as the 11-2 might, but it may feel like having difficulty fitting in.
And, from a Human Design perspective, you can clearly see people who do not know what they know, and will forever feel they are stupid, unless you are able to ask them the right questions, for them to see how much wisdom they have inside of them. They may also learn differently than people assume we all learn, though absorbing everything around them, instead of focusing on what is in front of them. You need to know WHO you are dealing with before you start labeling people with a disability/disorder which can scar them for life!
Now, lets talk about people who seem overly sensitive...
In Human Design, if someone has an open emotional system or the 19-49 channel, they are hyper-sensitive to how others feel. This is something we really need to appreciate, understand, and respect, because it is a gift (even though it will not feel that way if someone is not allowed to respect their own personal limits). In addition, if they have an open identity center, you can not expect them to self-regulate as they are essentially taken over by the energy of the people around them and amplifying this for all to see. They may appear to have ADHD or some other "disorder" because of this, but in truth they can not help how others affect them, they just need to know themselves and ask for space. We need to stop blaming and trying to control, and start understanding and trying to support! These are NOT rare traits! 50% of people have an open emotional system, and 50% of people have an open identify center, and some have both!
The same goes for people who carry 5s in their Soul Contract. People who carry 5s are pioneers. They are often misunderstood because they tend to be ahead of their time. And, like people with 11-2s, they may carry their own version of the truth, and be afraid to speak up, because of what happened to them in past lives, when they spoke up. They also tend to be very sensitive to their surroundings, and may not be well grounded in this reality. This puts them at increased risk for mental health issues, if their limits and needs are not respected!
Another Soul Contract number prone to being very emotionally sensitive is the 8. People who carry an 8 in their Soul Contract differ from those who carry a 5 in that I feel they have a choice. The 5s are scared to speak their truth and sensitive to their environment, whereas the 8s are sensitive to the emotions, expectations, and trappings of life and others.
Where 5s can learn to accept their sensitivity and fear, 8s can choose to set better boundaries with life and others. They can choose to take care of their needs, or they can choose to disengage with their body and decide it is simply easier to just opt out of participation in society/life. If they do not learn how to strike this very delicate balance, which takes time, and how to accept themselves fully, including respecting their limits, they are at high risk for making attempts on their life!
In addition, someone who carries a karmic 9 in their Soul Contract is very powerful, but feels dis-empowered by others.
As I mention in this article "A More Supportive Approach to Mental Health", when we force people who are sensitive to try to overcome their sensitivity, with behavioural therapy or drugs, we kill a part of them, and this can make them much worse off in the long run.
Not to mention, as I alluded to, the person could also be "full, processing, or detoxifying (aka. dropping baggage)". Because some people are more sensitive and more easily shocked than others, processing can be quite a destabilizing process, and we need to respect people (of all ages) as they go through this process and not try to force more on them when they are clearly in a sorting and coping stage, weeding through what was placed on them before, in order to be able to continue to function well, again.
The pressure to keep kids on track at school, is truly a Race to Nowhere!
Processing what information to integrate, and how, can be very destabilizing
Photo by Christian Erfurt on Unsplash
This even has applications beyond learning and environment, see "The possible link between child eating preference and brain function" for the potential importance of respecting your child's eating preference.
So, protective or something to fix?...
For me, I carry 11-2s, 5s, 8s, and a 10-1 in my Soul Contract, and I have an open emotional system in my Human Design. I was labelled as having a learning disability and had severe anxiety. And, for me, these things were protective!
The feelings of anxiety reminded me of where I was meant to be and who my people are (and are not), and the things I was having trouble learning were simply not my truth. My truth is very different to most people's truths. I am here to be of service with my unique gifts of sensitivity and my unique understanding of life.
If I force myself to be like others and to operate where others operate, not only do I get physically and mentally ill, I am also unable to serve my purpose!
I will admit, the accommodations for someone with a "learning disability" (such as extra time for writing exams, having my books on tape, having my exams read to me, writing in a room by myself, etc) were helpful and allowed me to complete the education that I wanted to pursue.
BUT what was not helpful was saying that what I have is a disability! It is not a disability, its a sensitivity and a different version of the truth! And something that I and others need to consider and respect!
In my opinion, children should have the choice what to accommodate, and what they want to learn or pass on.
Children should have the choice in what to learn, and what to pass on
Photo by Tina Floersch on Unsplash
For me, I had no use (or ability to take in) geography and history. I still do not follow the news, it is not my truth, nor my area to be of service. I work better one on one. And whenever I enter a museum display about outer space I feel a bit weird because what they see as cold science, I see as alive spiritual energy, and it seems like such a disconnect for me to see the world through this mainstream lens.
Like me, my son has 11-2s, 10-1s, 5s, 8s, and a karmic 9 in his Soul Contract. Although he does not have an open emotional system or the 19-49 channel in his Human Design, he does have an open identity center, and his Human Design type is someone who does not want to be controlled, he will only do something if his heart is in it, and his emotional system is one that easily explodes when it has reached its limit.
As a result, he is not interested in learning all the building blocks in the order school says he needs them. We are allowing him to miss some of the "crucial" building blocks and to be behind in others.
We have asked him:
- if he wants more help, or
- if he wants to wait for the skills to come on their own.
He chooses option B, and we support him fully!
Extra pressure to get him to keep up with the school's expected schedule does not help. In fact, in my case, pressure only contributes to worsened blocks to learning and anxiety symptoms.
We need to relax and trust that kids will figure it out and find their way, and let them take their time.
As an older sister, I had to learn, eventually, that my younger sister can find her own way, often a better way for her than what I can direct her to. The same goes for kids.
So, in the end, if your child is behind in school, if they are sensitive, talk to them.
Talk to your child!
Photo by Greg Raines on Unsplash
- Ask them what they think is a problem and what doesn't bother them so much.
- Seek their preference and advocate for them.
- Check their Human Design and Soul Contract.
We are all unique, and all that matters is that we are on track for our own unique path and that we feel good about how we are progressing!
- Stop trying to fit all kids in the same bucket, on the same time-frame. We don't want sick cookie cutter products, we want healthy uniqueness.
Yes, it takes trust. But, when you can see your child's unique design, you will see there is nothing wrong with them, they are just playing out their uniqueness beautifully, and knowing this makes it a lot easier to trust!
Reach out if this is something that interests you.
Love and Bless, Strong Family,
Family Dynamics and Life Purpose Specialist
MSc Psychology/Neuroscience (Stress & Health)
* And please know that this becomes incredibly critical when it comes to entering the spiritual realm, see "Full access to your sensitivity and learning blocks are critical for navigation".
** Finally, if you are wondering why this article is included under my "YHALP Unique Collaborations" umbrella, it is because I know practitioners out there who feel they can support, accommodate, and "fix" learning disabilities and sensitivities. But I have not tried their service, nor am I sure this is what everyone needs. So, for now, I will hold back on mentioning who these practitioners are, until it becomes more obvious that this is something that is needed for your unique and amazing child.
p.s., This article refers to children who are otherwise "normal" and "healthy", it does not apply children who may have brain damage, due to vaccines or otherwise. In these children, I think the debate is a lot bigger than whether we should label them with a learning disability and/or force them to learn or overcome their personal limits, due to their unique sensitivities.